Who’s in the driving seat?

Rabbi the Driver

Open road driving in Zambia

I’m not good at waiting. I never have been. Impatience being a blight on my character since an early age.   However, as I’ve gotten older and become a more responsible human  being I have learned some degree of patience, particularly in the more overt situations such as waiting in line at Sainsbury’s checkout and not jumping in with the answer in a pub quiz. Unwise if the answer is wrong because pub quizzers are a competitive lot and if you are the reason a round is lost, woe betide you.

Where I continue to struggle (and it is a daily battle) is waiting for direction about a certain issue, request, or concern from the One I’ve made it my life’s commitment to follow.  Being able to sit at Jesus’ feet, surrendering everything and waiting patiently for the answer has never been in my gene pool.  I can sit and pour out my heart to Him, and I do, regularly.  I can even let it all go, briefly.  But the hard truth is, I inevitably end up taking everything back when the next wave hits.  It’s not that I don’t trust Jesus, it’s just that I feel I can get the result I need quicker if I help move things along. After all, what’s God given common sense for?

A stark object lesson for me in this was when I recently tried to sell my house. I said, “Lord, I’ll do whatever you want, but just tell me.”  A reasonable request given the people renting it had given notice and were happily moving on.   Circumstances, scripture and good old Christian council all seemed to line up, so I stepped out and put my God-given-total-blessing of a house on the market.  A previous offer suggested that it would sell just fine.

It didn’t. Four months later it was still sitting empty and winter was fast approaching.  So I enquired again, “Lord, I’ll do whatever you want, but just tell me.” I gave a deadline by which time I needed an offer to be made on the house and waited. Not one viewing during that time. So I put the house up for rent again and it was let within three days.

“Did I hear you right, Lord?” I enquired. “I never told you to sell in the first place,” came the reply.  Rolling my eyes heavenward I had to admit that was true enough.  Fears about meeting mortgage payments and letting agent issues had lead me turn all the sign posts towards my preferred direction.  What I was actually saying was, “Right Lord, you are in the driving seat, but just take the next left for me.”

As a child brought up in a children’s home, fighting my corner and working things out for myself was paramount to my survival. Losing control of a situation seemed foolhardy, not to mention downright irresponsible. It’s not that I am a control-freak, but having contingency plans seemed seemed prudent then.  But is it now as a child of God?

As the great prophet Jeremiah declared, “Lord, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps. Discipline me, Lord, but only in due measure— not in your anger, or you will reduce me to nothing.” (Jeremiah 10:23-24 NIV)

About jazz64

Writer, photographer, filmmaker and general vagabond whose committed to inspirational stories and the art of influence.
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4 Responses to Who’s in the driving seat?

  1. Toni says:

    I’m not sure there is a problem when the way ahead isn’t clear and you push a few doors – I’ve been doing this myself recently, and they seem to have been shut, despite all initail indications to the contrary.
    We do need to be careful because sometimes there can be a fine line between uncertainty and willful disobedience, where one makes sure one doesn’t listen to the voice that’s speaking loud & clear in order to follow a particular course: & then blame God. It’s funny how sometimes guidance is so clear & simple, while at other times it’s murky and indistinct. I suspect the more knowledge and involvement one has, the harder it is to push ‘us’ out of the way.

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  2. Toni says:

    Grrrrr. for typos.

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  3. jazz64 says:

    Like I say, it is a daily chore isn’t it. I initially titled this post “Deafening Silence” but felt it was a bit obscure. But what you say is true – the louder the voice giving direction, the more cautious you need to be in moving forward.

    Btw, what typos? In the post text? I didn’t see any, but there again I am dyslexic.

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  4. Toni says:

    Line 3: initail instead of initial. It’s not the end of the world. [shrug]

    Not sure about a deafening silence so much as a deafening lack of listening – speaking personally, you understand – because of being caught up in of filled with other stuff.

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